This book covers the differences as well as the
indifferences between men and women and fully explains why each is behaving
differently. Some of the behavior maybe tolerable while others, you really need
this book as a guide as to why such behavior is executed. I find the book not
only helpful in maintaining personal relationship but I also find it insightful
as applied in a work area. Every part of the book is worth reading. There are
some explicit graphic pictures on the book but that is only a presentation and
justification by the authors as to what they are talking about.
A straightforward answer to the question that has
been a title of this book:
Why men don’t have a clue? Men don’t have a clue
because their brains were designed for mono–tracking of information and data
which is opposite to women which is on a “multi–tracking” mode. Male brains
were also programmed to absorb “direct” thoughts rather than an “indirect” one.
Why women always need more shoes? It is because
unlike dress, shoes are “for all season.” It doesn’t matter whether you are
small, medium or large, a shoe will always fit the scale.
Here are some “Humorous” excerpts from the book:
On page 2, “A women worries about the future until
she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.”
On page 3, “Have you ever noticed that all women’s
problem start with MEN?
MEN – opause
MEN – strual pain
MEN – tal illness
GUY – naecologist
HIS – terectomy
On page 4, “By the year 2020, it is estimated that
25% of all women in the Western world will be permanently single.”
On page 5, “Women evolved as child–bearers and
nest–defenders and, and as a result, female brains became hardwired to nurture,
nourish, love and care for the people in their lives. Men evolved with
completely different job description – they were hunters, chasers, protectors,
providers and problem–solvers. It makes sense that male and female brains are
hardwired for different functions and priorities.
Consequently, men either don’t try all with
relationships or they give up early, because they find way women think and act
too complex. It sometimes seems all too hard and it’s easier to quit early than
be seen as a failure. But the truth is that men want good, healthy, fulfilling
relationships just as much as women. They simply assume that one day a perfect relationship
will come along, without the need for prior study or preparation. Women
regularly make the mistake of assuming that just because a man loves her, he
must also understand her. But he usually doesn’t. We call each other the
“opposite” sex for a good reason – we are opposite.”
On page 9, “When a women gives a personal
development book to another woman, the woman who receives it is honored and
thankful for a gift that may help her improve. A man, however, may feel
insulted and feel the woman is saying he’s not good enough the way he is.”
On page 22, “Male brains are organized for
MONO–TRACKING. They can only concentrate on one thing at a time. When a man
opens a map, he turns the radio off.”
“One of the big problems for men is when
MULTI–TRACKING happens during the nagging process. It’s all too much for him so
he simply shuts off. This goes on to begin a vicious cycle of the nagger
increasing her volume and the strength of her accusations or claim to
entitlement while the victim retreats further behind his barrier, often to the
point of putting physical distance between himself and the nagger.”
On page 23, “A clear sign that intimacy exists
between the male boss and his secretary is when she begins to nag him about the
things he hasn’t done.”
On page 24, “Sex sirens don’t usually nag, either.
They have power too, although a different kind. They use their sexual power to
get their own way with men. They could never be bothered nagging about dirty
clothes on the floor – they drop their own clothes on the floor, and very
sensually, too.”
On page 25, “Our research shows that women, who
are goal–oriented, work more than 30 hours per week or who happily accept the
monotonous and repetitive ritual of housework and motherhood, rarely nag.”
On page 27, “The trouble is that the woman is then
tempted to treat her partner more as a naughty little boy than a capable man.
His reaction, as a result, is to start behaving like one.”
On page 28, “Nagging is so often a clear signal
that a communication problem exists between two people. Instead of addressing
that problem, however, it’s usually far easier to pick on little trivial things
and bait each other with those instead.”
On page 29, “If the woman in your life is nagging
you, then SHE HAS SOMETHING TO TELL YOU and YOU’RE NOT LISTENING, so she’s
going to keep on telling you until you do. The reason YOU ARE NOT LISTENING is
because she’s not approaching you the right way. Women HABITUALLY approach
their men the wrong way with INDIRECT talk.”
On page 43, “Consequently, for a woman to offer a
man advice when he didn’t ask for it is seen by him as a statement that she
feels he is INCOMPETENT because he can’t solve his own problems. A man sees
asking for advice as a WEAKNESS because he feels he should be solving his problems
himself and this is why he will rarely talk about what is bothering him.”
On page 44, “Herein lies the problem for most
COUPLES – at the end of the day SHE usually wants to talk about the events in
her day and to share her feelings, but HE thinks she is giving him her problems
to fix and starts to offer solutions. SHE gets upset because HE won’t listen to
her talking, and he becomes angry because she won’t accept his solutions.”
On page 51, “Firstly, having a solution–oriented,
problem solving brain, HE is interested in getting to the bottom line as
quickly as possible. By flicking through the channels, he can analyze the
problems in each programme and consider the solution needed. Secondly, men like
to forget about their own problems by looking at someone else’s, which explains
why six times as many MEN watch the TV evening news bulleting as WOMEN. Since
his mind can only do one thing at a time, by looking at other people’s problems
and not feeling responsible for them, he can forget about HIS OWN WORRIES. It
therefore becomes a form of stress relief, just like surfing the internet,
working on his car, watering the garden, working out in the gym or, OFTEN HIS
FAVORITE, having sex. As long as a man concentrates on one thing, he’s always
able to forget his own troubles, and feel good about himself.”
On page 52, “Silence from a man doesn’t mean he
doesn’t love her. It means he wants QUIET time.”
On page 53, “The most plausible explanation for
DIRECTION–SENSING is that MEN have a higher concentration of IRON in the right
hemisphere which allows them to feel magnetic NORTH. This is the same skill a
man uses to find his way back to his seat at a sport match, relocate his car in
a multi–storey car park and return to a location he’s only been to once before.”
On page 54, “Why does it take 4 million sperm to
find and fertilized an egg? Not one wants to ask for directions.”(On why men
don’t want to ask for direction)
On page 55, “Yet the practice of going to the
toilet in groups still persists for women. A man will never be heard to say,
“Hey Fred, I’m going to the toilet….would you like to come?”
On page 56, “Women should understand that
sometimes a man’s PENIS has a MIND of its own. A man can go into a toilet
cubicle (because all the urinals are being used), take perfect aim at the
toilet, and his PENIS will still manage to pee all over the roll of toilet
paper, down his left pant leg, and to his shoe. I’m telling you, John Thomas
can’t be trusted.
On page 58, “Dr. David Lewis found the stress men
experience while Christmas shopping ranks with the kind of stress experienced
by a police officer dealing with an angry mob in a riot. For most women, on the
other hand, shopping is a much– loved form of stress relief.”
On page 59, “A woman will dress carefully
according to her weather, the season, fashion, her own colouring, where she’s
going, how she feels about herself that day, who she’s seeing, what she’ll be
doing. A man merely performs the SNIFF TEST on a piece of clothing he’s left
lying over the arm of a chair.”
On page 60, “To many women, it seems as if men are
hardwired to buy UGLY clothes for themselves and this is not far from the
truth. For at least a hundred thousand years, WOMEN dressed TO ATTRACT while
MEN have dressed TO FRIGHTEN away their enemies.”
On page 62, “At the top of the list of men’s
habits women won’t tolerate are nose– picking, burping, body odour, wearing
ancient underwear and crotch scratching. But number one on her list is
farting.”
On page 68, “Laughing and crying instruct the
brain to release endorphins into the blood stream. An endorphin is a chemical
that has a similar composition to morphine and heroin, and has a tranquilizing
effect on the body while, at the same time, building the immune system. This
explains why happy people rarely got sick and miserable people who complain a
lot often seem to fall ill.”
On page 69, “Laughter anaesthetizes the body,
builds the immune system, defends against illness and disease, aids memory,
teaches more efficiently and extends life. Humor heals. Research around the
world has now shown how the positive effects of laughing, with release of the
body’s own painkillers, strengthen the immune system. After laughter, the pulse
rate steadies, breathing deepens, arteries dilate and the muscles relax.”
On page 71, “Women’s brains are hardwired to
nurture and mother others, particularly their sons. They pick up after their
son, cook his favorite meals, iron his clothes, give him money and protect him
from the trials of life. As a consequence, many boys reach manhood with few
domestic skills and abilities, and little understanding of how to make
relationships work with women.”
On page 72, “…men did not evolve as nest–defenders
and general tidiness is not something which comes naturally to them.”
On page 75, “There are times when people cry as a
direct response from the heart, but MANY TIMES they cry as a way of manipulating
other’s emotions.”
On page 80, “Emotional blackmail is where a person
who is emotionally close to you subtly threatens to punish you or threatens or
implies that you will suffer if you don’t comply with what they want. They know
your deepest secrets and vulnerabilities and use this intimate knowledge to get
you obey. Whatever strengths or weakness you have, the blackmailer will use
them against you.”
On page 91, “Men are not used to dealing with
their emotions and have little idea about how to deal with emotional women.”
On page 94, “Emotional blackmail destroys a
victim’s self–image. If they continue to yield to the blackmailer, they will
eventually lose their self–confidence and forever be robbed of the ability to
assert themselves.”
“Blackmailers are usually just bullies. They have
a poor self–image and can’t handle rejection. They lack the self–confidence to
discuss their situation and consider the options, and are desperately
frightened of losing what they already have. They’ll usually accuse their
victims of being selfish, uncaring or self–centered – all the qualities THEY
THEMSELVES POSSESS. In many ways, they are like naughty children. They make
their demand and, if it is not satisfied immediately, throw a tantrum. Every
time a parent gives in to a tantrum, they are sowing the seeds of an emotional
blackmailer.”
On page 95, “Without your consent, the blackmailer
feels powerless. The only way to lose your power is to show weakness. Don’t
plead with them not to be so difficult and don’t accept any blame for the
situation.”
On page 98, “When you surrender to the emotional
blackmailer’s initial threats, an unpleasant cycle may develop that will become
progressively more difficult to stop. The blackmailer could eventually ruin the
victim, emotionally, psychologically and financially.”
On page 106, “As most women know, men have ALWAYS
BELIEVED that size matters.” For women, it’s not size that matters, it’s
FREQUENCY.”
On page 124, “For almost all of human existence,
males have been POLYGAMOUS for survival reasons. Men were always in SHORT
SUPPLY because many were killed while hunting or fighting, so it made perfect
sense for their survivors to adopt the widowed females into their harems. This
would also give the men a greater opportunity to pass on their genes.”
On page 125, “Most men will avoid committing to a
relationship as they feel a woman will take away their freedom and they will
become weak and powerless.”
On page 126, “What women expect in return is love,
devotion and loyalty. The LAST thing on their mind is taking away a man’s
freedom.”
On page 127, “MEN see being direct as a SIGN of
RESPECT so, if a woman wants a commitment, she should ASK FOR IT, rather than
just EXPECT it.”
On page 130, “A woman should avoid any approach to
a man that will make him feel HE’S WRONG. Instead, she should talk about how
she feels, as opposed to HOW WRONG HE IS.”
On page 132, “Because of the spatial arrangement
of the male brain, men and boys become addicted to anything that has buttons, a
motor or moving parts, makes sounds, has flashing lights and runs on
batteries.”
On page 134, “There’s a lesson in this: always buy
a man a spatially–related toy as present. Never give him flowers or a nice
card; they won’t mean a thing to him.”
On page 146, “Many mothers RUIN their sons for the
NEXT WOMEN in their lives. They mother them, cook, clean, wash and iron for
them. They believe they are showing their sons love with these acts, but they
are ACTUALLY causing problems for their sons in later life when they develop
relationships with women. The sons, in the end, find it hard to do the things
their mothers DID FOR THEM.”
On page 164, “Silence is used as a form of
punishment and is an effective tactic when used on other women. This tactic
doesn’t work on men – men feel the added “peace and quiet” is a bonus.”
On page 165, “If a woman wants to punish a man,
the easiest way is to talk to him non–stop and keep changing the subject.”
On page 168, “Both men and women EXAGGERATE. The
difference is that men exaggerate FACTS & DATA while WOMEN exaggerate
EMOTIONS and FEELINGS.”
On page 169, “For a MAN, a woman’s exaggeration
can be FRUSTRATING because his brains relies on FACTS and DATA for
understanding and he DECODES words literally.”
On page 173, “Women’s indirect speech has a
purpose – it builds relationships and rapport with others by avoiding
aggression, confrontation or discord. From an evolutionary point of view, being
indirect allowed women to avoid disagreement with one another and made it
easier to bond by not appearing to be dominant or aggressive. This approach
fits perfectly into a woman’s overall approach to preserving harmony.”
On page 175, “A woman needs to understand that if
a man doesn’t follow what she’s saying he’ll often pretend he understands rather
than look like he’s stupid.”
On page 181, “A woman thinks when a man doesn’t
talk much it means he mustn’t love her because, FOR HER, words are used to
bond. A man thinks a woman talks too much and is trying to INTERROGATE him.”
“As nest–defenders of the human race, a WOMAN
would make sure she had a close circle of friends who would look after her if
the men didn’t return from hunting or fighting. HER group of friends was like
her INSURANCE POLICY.
On page 197, “Women like OLDER men because they have
more experience and greater access to resources.”
On page 198, “Attractive people get better jobs,
higher pay, are more believed and are allowed to break rules MORE OFTEN than
their less attractive counterparts. BILL CLINTON proves it.”
On page 200, “It’s important to understand that a
woman’s body has evolved as a permanent, PORTABLE sexual signaling system,
which is purpose – built to attract male attention.”
On page 201, “Most men prefer a heavier woman to a
leaner one because additional fat is an aid to successful bread–feeding. Few
women know that one of the world’s greatest sex symbols, MARILY MONROE, was a
size 16 and had very beefy legs. As far as men are concerned, no undernourished
waif could ever become a real sex symbol.
On page 205, “Most men prefer women with rounded,
thicker legs over those with thinner, muscular legs, because additional fat
highlights the sex difference between male female legs and is an indicator of
better lactation.”
On page 213, “And for a woman’s face to be universally
classified as “pretty” the formula is clear – it must be childlike.”
On page 214, “Zoologist believes a woman’s lips
evolved as a MIRROR of her GENITALS because they are the same size and
thickness and, in an aroused sexual state, both expand as they fill with
blood.”
On page 215, “the length of women’s earlobes has
been taken as an indicator of her sensuality…” “the longer a woman’s earrings
dangle, the higher male respondents rate her sensuality.”
On page 217, “Men are more attracted to a woman who
wears natural looking make –up than one who looks AS IF she applied it with a
brick–layer’s trowel.”
On page 219, “a woman should wear LONG HAIR when
she wants to attract men, and wear it short or keep it up for business
meetings.”
Also on page 219, “Looking at pornography is
almost entirely a male activity, with 99% of pornographic websites on the
Internet aimed at men and most images of naked men are aimed at gay men.”
On page 221, “The ONLY fashion shows many MEN will
actively enjoy are swimsuit parades.”
On page 224, “It is important, however, for
everyone to understand that cosmetic surgery won’t make you a better person,
make you more loved or even take away your problems in life. Correspondingly,
anyone who judges you by your appearance has a low self–image problem
themselves, and is not the kind of person you want to be associated with.”
On page 226, “Your grandmother may have said,
“People should never judged a book by its cover” but the reality is: they do.”
On page 235, “But beware of not making your
appearance too perfect, because women may assume its contrived or that you’re
too self–obsessed, which is a big turn–off for most women. They don’t want a
man who is egotistical. No woman wants TO COMPETE for the MIRROR with her
partner.”
On page 239, “Female sex appeal is a
sophisticated, complex process, but male physical sex appeal is much more basic
and straightforward.”
On page 240, “A study in Scotland found that the
kind of male face a woman finds ATTRACTIVE can differ depending on where she is
IN HER CYCLE. If she is OVULATING, she’s attracted to men with RUGGED,
MASCULINE features. If she’s MENSTRUATING, she is more likely to be attracted
to a man with scissors shoved in his head.”
On page 242, “The V–shape also appeals to a woman
because it’s the OPPOSITE of what she is; she has an INVERTED V–SHAPE.
Wherever, she has curves and softness, a man’s body usually has angles and
firmness and its difference which can prove so attractive.”
On page 243, “Women are certainly attracted to a well–defined
male upper body but most dislike the “muscle men” body–builder look because
they feel such a man is likely to be far more interested in his own beauty than
in hers.”
On page 245, “The secret is that a TIGHT, MUSCULAR
REAR is necessary to make the strong forward thrusting motion during sex.”
“….when a woman pats a man’s rear; she’s actually encouraging him to have an
ERECTION.”
On page 246, “bald–headed men are usually more
aggressive and hornier than their hairy–headed brothers, so baldness becomes a
super–male signal.”
On page 248, “What has been found, however, is
that a man’s nose expands with blood during sexual arousal and increases in
temperature by up to six degrees, just like his penis.”
On page 250, “For thousands of years the length of
a man’s penis has been associated with perceived power and prowess as a lover,
but the power is more in the mind than in the actual organ”…”The reality is
that a man with a
THREE–INCH erection can deliver a more ACCURATE
service than a man with a SEVEN–INCHER, as the shorter one can ACCURATELY hit
the right spots.”
On page 251, “When a man sees a NAKED WOMAN, he
becomes dumbstruck. When a woman sees a NAKED MAN, she usually burst into
LAUGHTER.”
On page 255, “Even the WOMEN who are
self–sufficient and financially independent are attracted to the man who stacks
up as good protector and provider.”
On page 262, “There are four basic types of LIES –
the WHITE lies, the BENEFICIAL lies, the MALICIOUS lies and the DECEPTIVE
lies.”
On page 263, “It’s the Deceptive lie that is the
dangerous one because the liar INTENDS to harm or disadvantage the victim for
their own benefit.”
On page 264, “Malicious lies, or rumor–mongering,
are often used as weapons in competitive situations. Malicious liars are set
out to destroy the character and reputations of their victims, usually with
devastating and lasting results.”
On page 267, “A woman will LIE to make YOU feel
good. A man will LIE to make himself LOOK GOOD.”
On page 268, “The evidence is clear – women lie
just as much as men, they simply lie DIFFERENTLY. Because of women’s
super–awareness of body language and voice signals, men get caught far more
often, which makes it seem like men lie more. They don’t. They just keep
getting caught.”
On page 270, “Most men know how difficult it is to
tell even the smallest lie to a woman, face–to–face, without getting caught. If
a man must lie to her, he’d do much better over the telephone. Most women have
less difficulty lying straight to a man’s face – and they usually get away with
it.”
On page 286, “it’s interesting to note that a
man’s penis also swells during a lie. So if you’re not sure whether a man is
lying or not, PULL his PANTS down.”
On page 299, “Men value accomplishments, women
value relationships.”
On page 325, “Clothes shopping are often a
negative or disappointing experience for women because most things won’t fit,
they look bad, are too expensive or highlight a woman’s liabilities. SHOES
don’t fit into these categories because women don’t have to diet to fit into
shoes – you ONLY have to know your size.”
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